So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
