Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
