So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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