After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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