We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
