wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize