great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I see more hoeing in ur future
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