I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I am naked and annoyed.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize