There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize