just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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