How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
