there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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