just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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