the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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