Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
