So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize