You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i believe in u and ur pee
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