so explain again why im purple
no
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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