420 ftw
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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