All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
