when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize