did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize