in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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