He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
