just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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