Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
...so i touched it.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off