I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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