My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
and she was petting her beer can
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
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I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
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Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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