I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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