Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize