We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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