She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
