How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
NoShamevember. You game?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm getting married
To pizza
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
