I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
tell me about the eggs
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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