I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
