i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
