I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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