Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
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You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
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I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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