Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Let's paint friendship bongs
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
