At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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