how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Randomize
