I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize