is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize