He had one of those small greek statue penises
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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