Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
