This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
