First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
