dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
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