My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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