FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
