Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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