he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
